Headlights Shine | Rain haiku poem example | 011409

Headlights shine
on puddles, raindrops
bouncing.

Ken Wagner on Haiku Habits

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11 thoughts on “Headlights Shine | Rain haiku poem example | 011409

  1. Actually prefer the first version. I like that it gives you that’s it’s road scene, seen from sidewalk or car.
    What follows is not a suggestion, but my own version from memories of the same sight:

    Heavy raindrops fall,
    bounce up from glinting puddles
    in headlights’ shine

  2. Kris – Thanks for the feedback. Your poem captures the moment very well.
    sanjay – Thanks for the comment! I have enjoyed following your site. I’m a subscriber!
    Dr Zen – You have been quite active on Twitter! The two samples you posted here are quite nice and on point.

  3. I think you nailed it, Adriaan. By capturing the light with “glistening,” you were able to place the focus squarely on the motion of the raindrops. Great work!

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