Snow melts on a flat field – What happened to us?
Ken Wagner on Haiku Habits
See also We Chatted
7 Comments
Filed under Haiku Poems About Snow
Was – Snow melts on a flat street - Indifference
You got that feeling? Street or field, melting snow conveys warmth – I mean the idea — I have never seen snow or snow melting
wishes, devika
You are correct, Devika. Too abstract. Let me try another revision. Thanks for pushing.
Was – Snow melts on a flat field - Indifference
I like this.
this website is great. <3 the haiku overdose.
in the warmth of my thought snow melted outside
Thanks, Dave and Caroline.
Gautami – I like the poem very much. For some reason, I think “melts” may work better than “melted”. Cheers!
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Was –
Snow melts
on a flat street -
Indifference
You got that feeling?
Street or field, melting snow conveys warmth –
I mean the idea — I have never seen snow or snow melting
wishes,
devika
You are correct, Devika. Too abstract. Let me try another revision. Thanks for pushing.
Was –
Snow melts
on a flat field -
Indifference
I like this.
this website is great. <3 the haiku overdose.
in the warmth
of my thought
snow melted outside
Thanks, Dave and Caroline.
Gautami – I like the poem very much. For some reason, I think “melts” may work better than “melted”. Cheers!